
1
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,013
<b>[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

2
00:00:19,811 --> 00:00:21,146
I hate you!

3
00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,106
- <b>[CLOCK CHIMES]</b>
- <b>[SCREAMS]</b>

4
00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:24,189
<b>[DOOR OPENS]</b>

5
00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:27,193
What is going on? What happened?

6
00:00:30,405 --> 00:00:33,616
Aravind? We weren't expecting you
till tomorrow morning.

7
00:00:34,367 --> 00:00:37,620
Devi, why are you screaming at your uncle?

8
00:00:37,704 --> 00:00:40,874
- Uh, cause he scared the crap out of me.
- <b>[CHUCKLES]</b>

9
00:00:40,957 --> 00:00:42,786
<b><font color=
Aravind Periyappa?

10
00:00:42,792 --> 00:00:44,794
Currently, I'm looking for mustard.

11
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,922
He's also here to be the male chaperone
for Prashant's visit.

12
00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:50,633
Hey, let me help you.
You come. Sit, sit.

13
00:00:50,717 --> 00:00:53,386
You must be so tired after driving
all the way from San Jose.

14
00:00:53,470 --> 00:00:55,680
I'm sorry if I frightened you,

15
00:00:55,764 --> 00:00:58,224
but you left the spare key
under the mat.

16
00:00:58,308 --> 00:01:03,188
And as the owner of the number two
home security company in San Jose area,

17
00:01:03,271 --> 00:01:05,774
I must say your house
is very easy to break into.

18
00:01:05,857 --> 00:01:10,779
I know, Aravind. You try and sell me
a security system every visit.

19
00:01:10,862 --> 00:01:12,864
What if Prashant came here tomorrow,

20
00:01:12,947 --> 00:01:16,076
and found everyone chopped up
into little pieces by a murderer?

21
00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:18,864
That would leave him
with a very bad impression of our family.

22
00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:21,790
Hey, why did you have to use a spare key?
Why didn't someone let you in?

23
00:01:21,873 --> 00:01:25,502
Kamala was asleep. I could hear
her beautiful snoring from upstairs,

24
00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:26,585
and Devi just got home.

25
00:01:27,212 --> 00:01:28,088
Where were you?

26
00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:30,256
And what are you wearing?

27
00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:32,050
Uh...

28
00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:33,802
Sweats. I went for a run.

29
00:01:33,885 --> 00:01:34,803
- At night?
- At night?

30
00:01:34,886 --> 00:01:37,847
You cannot run in Los Angeles at night.

31
00:01:37,931 --> 00:01:40,809
This is the city of Charles Manson
and Harvey Weinstein!

32
00:01:40,892 --> 00:01:42,393
I think it's okay.

33
00:01:42,477 --> 00:01:43,997
The worst criminal in our neighborhood

34
00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:46,147
is the lady who watered her lawn
during the drought.

35
00:01:46,231 --> 00:01:48,817
I reported her,
and she's been punished accordingly.

36
00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:50,985
All right. It's very late.

37
00:01:51,069 --> 00:01:53,429
I want to be fresh to meet
Kamala's future husband tomorrow,

38
00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:54,906
so let's all get some sleep.

39
00:01:54,989 --> 00:01:57,575
I don't know if I can fall asleep
in a house

40
00:01:57,659 --> 00:02:00,870
where a burglar can walk in at any time
and murder me,

41
00:02:01,287 --> 00:02:03,540
but I will do my best.

42
00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:04,833
Good night, Periyappa.

43
00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:08,878
♪ Tide, tide turning ♪

44
00:02:09,462 --> 00:02:11,047
♪ The waves come crashing... ♪

45
00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,466
<b>McENROE:</b> Devi mistaking her uncle
for her dad

46
00:02:13,550 --> 00:02:15,969
had dug up a memory
she'd buried deep inside.

47
00:02:16,052 --> 00:02:17,053
I hate you!

48
00:02:18,388 --> 00:02:19,848
<b>McENROE:</b> She was so rattled by it,

49
00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:22,892
she almost forgot
a much more exciting new memory.

50
00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:26,229
She just kissed Paxton
fricking Hall fricking Yoshida!

51
00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,314
<b><font color=

52
00:02:32,986 --> 00:02:35,738
Paxton. Think about Paxton.

53
00:02:42,162 --> 00:02:43,454
<b>[SIGHS]</b>
Dammit!

54
00:02:49,377 --> 00:02:51,379
Not everything is about you
and your problems!

55
00:02:55,550 --> 00:02:59,137
Maybe you would benefit
from a different approach.

56
00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:02,307
You've turned into this fake person

57
00:03:02,390 --> 00:03:04,052
who doesn't give a shit
about her real friends!

58
00:03:04,058 --> 00:03:05,058
<b>DEVI:</b> I hate you!

59
00:03:07,770 --> 00:03:09,105
<b>[DEVI SCREAMS]</b>

60
00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,691
<b>McENROE:</b> Looks like
it's gonna be a long night.

61
00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:17,697
Devi, come on. Get up.
Prashant's gonna be here in an hour.

62
00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:18,907
Mom.

63
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:22,619
Can't I have a little more time?
I barely slept last night.

64
00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:24,913
<b>NALINI:</b> Out of be right now
and put on something nice.

65
00:03:24,996 --> 00:03:27,248
How about that pretty dress I got
at Costco

66
00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:29,209
while buying our annual supply
of toilet paper?

67
00:03:29,292 --> 00:03:30,376
<b>McENROE:</b> Oh, that dress?

68
00:03:30,460 --> 00:03:33,796
It's currently sitting in the back
of Paxton's Jeep, soaked in pool water.

69
00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:35,965
Yeah. I can't wear that.

70
00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:38,301
I mean, I'll look too good.

71
00:03:38,384 --> 00:03:41,512
We want Prashant to fall in love
with Kamala and not me, right?

72
00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:43,008
You know what?
Wear whatever you want.

73
00:03:43,014 --> 00:03:45,600
But please, just remember,
today is Kamala's day,

74
00:03:45,683 --> 00:03:48,561
so let's not have
any of the usual Devi nonsense.

75
00:03:49,354 --> 00:03:51,648
I don't know what you mean
by "Devi nonsense."

76
00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:54,943
I returned home last night to find you
screaming in your uncle's face.

77
00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:56,027
Fair enough.

78
00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:58,446
I promise to be on my best behavior.

79
00:03:58,529 --> 00:03:59,405
<b>[CELL PHONE VIBRATING]</b>

80
00:03:59,489 --> 00:04:02,367
<b><font color=
or Fabiola trying to apologize.

81
00:04:02,450 --> 00:04:06,246
And I am taking this to my room.
Don't need you distracted today.

82
00:04:06,329 --> 00:04:08,209
What if it's a college
offering early admission?

83
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:12,418
Devi, for once can you please try
not to make my life any harder?

84
00:04:13,711 --> 00:04:14,963
I hate you!

85
00:04:16,005 --> 00:04:19,008
Kanna, you do not say such things
to your mother.

86
00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:24,389
She can say whatever she wants to me
'cause I'm not the irresponsible girl

87
00:04:24,472 --> 00:04:27,934
who lost her sheet music
right before her concert started!

88
00:04:28,017 --> 00:04:30,853
That doesn't mean I deserve to be grounded
for two weeks.

89
00:04:30,937 --> 00:04:32,105
Oh, yes, it does!

90
00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:34,108
Maybe it will teach you
not to be so thoughtless!

91
00:04:34,190 --> 00:04:35,608
Nalini, please calm down.

92
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:39,487
I will not come down when this child
insists on being such a headache to me!

93
00:04:39,570 --> 00:04:43,032
<b>McENROE:</b> Devi had hoped she'd slept
that memory off, but there it was again.

94
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,535
Of all days,
today she needed to be normal.

95
00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:48,329
So she had no choice but to shove
that memory back down

96
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:49,414
to where it came from.

97
00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:51,833
Yeah. Okay, Mom. I'll be good.

98
00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:53,751
Just let me get dressed.

99
00:04:53,835 --> 00:04:56,170
Okay. I'm sure whatever you wear
will be very nice.

100
00:04:56,254 --> 00:04:58,589
Now, I need to help Kamala get ready.

101
00:04:58,673 --> 00:05:01,968
Just gonna rub a little coconut oil
in her hair so she smells like his mother.

102
00:05:03,928 --> 00:05:06,389
Steve, you have nothing to worry about.

103
00:05:06,472 --> 00:05:08,260
<b>STEVE:</b> What if this guy
sweeps you off your feet?

104
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:09,309
I read on Wikipedia

105
00:05:09,392 --> 00:05:12,020
sometimes these Indian guys
come down the aisle on a horse!

106
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,023
It's not my wedding day.
It's just lunch.

107
00:05:15,106 --> 00:05:16,426
<b><font color=

108
00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,860
- I'm parked around the block.
- You're what?

109
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,779
Please go.
That street is permit parking only!

110
00:05:21,863 --> 00:05:22,739
You'll get a ticket!

111
00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:25,241
- You are worth the $40.
- Please stop calling.

112
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,618
I promise I will call you
after lunch is over.

113
00:05:28,244 --> 00:05:30,747
This is so unfair.
Do you see what Kamala is doing?

114
00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:31,830
I wasn't doing anything.

115
00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:34,393
She gets to be on her phone.
How come you're not yelling at her?

116
00:05:34,417 --> 00:05:37,253
Don't bother your cousin, sweetie.
She doesn't need any extra pressure.

117
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:40,173
Today's lunch will determine
whether or not she has a happy life.

118
00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:43,593
Great. Thank you
for relieving the pressure, Auntie.

119
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:44,676
Come on.

120
00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:47,013
<b>[LIGHT ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

121
00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:48,306
<b>[SIGHS DEEPLY]</b>

122
00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,644
Now, as a wife,
it's great to have your own opinions,

123
00:05:53,728 --> 00:05:56,606
but remember, sometimes Prashant will
come home from work

124
00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:58,107
and just want to watch cricket.

125
00:05:58,191 --> 00:05:59,984
Well, I plan to work too.

126
00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:03,071
Of course, kanna.
I'm a modern man.

127
00:06:03,154 --> 00:06:06,407
I know that you'll want to work
until you have children.

128
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:08,451
All sons. Fingers crossed.

129
00:06:08,951 --> 00:06:11,788
Remind me again, Aravind Periyappa,
were you ever married?

130
00:06:11,871 --> 00:06:14,248
Devi, don't pry
into your uncle's personal life.

131
00:06:14,707 --> 00:06:15,958
<b>[ARAVIND LAUGHS]</b>

132
00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:19,170
Oh, Devi, there have been many women

133
00:06:19,253 --> 00:06:21,631
who wanted to settle down
with old Aravind,

134
00:06:22,131 --> 00:06:23,841
but I'm sort of a lone wolf.

135
00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:25,259
Hard to pin down.

136
00:06:25,343 --> 00:06:28,930
The problem with being a security expert
is allowing someone to...

137
00:06:29,931 --> 00:06:31,432
break into your heart.

138
00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:32,642
<b><font color=

139
00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:35,103
It's Prashant.
I will open the door.

140
00:06:35,186 --> 00:06:37,730
Aravind, behind me to my left.
Kamala, to my right.

141
00:06:37,814 --> 00:06:40,174
Devi, next to her.
Devi, make sure you favor your left side.

142
00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:42,360
Kamala, both your sides are equally good.

143
00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:44,028
Come on.

144
00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:46,948
Deep breath.

145
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:51,743
Prashant?

146
00:06:52,120 --> 00:06:53,120
Hello.

147
00:06:53,162 --> 00:06:55,415
Whoa, damn. You're hot.

148
00:06:55,498 --> 00:06:57,375
Devi, don't say that to a stranger.

149
00:06:57,458 --> 00:06:58,626
I'm sorry I called you hot.

150
00:06:58,709 --> 00:07:00,920
It's just, like,
we were expecting an uggo.

151
00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,630
- Ow.
- No, no, it's okay.

152
00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:05,216
Uh, thank you for not thinking
I'm an uggo.

153
00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:07,718
Hi, I'm Prashant.

154
00:07:07,802 --> 00:07:09,804
<b>[ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

155
00:07:10,388 --> 00:07:11,764
Kamala.

156
00:07:14,976 --> 00:07:17,353
Oh, Prashant, please, please come in.

157
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,397
Welcome, welcome.
Take your shoes off. Uh-huh.

158
00:07:20,022 --> 00:07:22,817
- Welcome to out house.
- Wow, it's beautiful.

159
00:07:22,900 --> 00:07:23,734
Mm-hmm.

160
00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:25,653
Wow. What an amazing grandfather clock.

161
00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:29,031
Oh! <b>[LAUGHS]</b> What, this old thing?
Priceless family heirloom.

162
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:31,951
Um, Kamala, I brought you a small gift.

163
00:07:32,034 --> 00:07:34,120
Oh, that's so sweet.

164
00:07:39,375 --> 00:07:41,752
<b><font color=

165
00:07:42,670 --> 00:07:44,255
He knows his Indian women.

166
00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:46,883
A beaver is kind of
a weird choice, Prashant.

167
00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:48,551
No, it's perfect.

168
00:07:48,634 --> 00:07:50,219
It's the mascot of Caltech.

169
00:07:50,887 --> 00:07:51,929
How thoughtful.

170
00:07:52,013 --> 00:07:54,432
It was my college mascot too, at MIT.

171
00:07:54,515 --> 00:07:56,915
- After all, the beaver is...
- <b>TOGETHER:</b> Nature's engineer.

172
00:07:56,934 --> 00:07:59,896
I just googled the price.
Wow, that's valuable.

173
00:08:00,396 --> 00:08:02,815
Now you really need
a home security system.

174
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:04,817
Why don't I put that somewhere safe?

175
00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:07,403
- I can take it to your room, Kamala.
- Thank you, Devi.

176
00:08:07,945 --> 00:08:10,990
Don't take too long, and don't waste
your time looking for your phone.

177
00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:12,283
It's very well hidden.

178
00:08:13,201 --> 00:08:15,161
Prashant, you must be hungry.

179
00:08:15,244 --> 00:08:16,370
Please come, sit.

180
00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:23,544
Steve? Oh, my God!
You scared the crap out of me.

181
00:08:24,045 --> 00:08:26,339
You almost made me drop
this expensive-ass beaver!

182
00:08:26,422 --> 00:08:27,590
Nature's engineer?

183
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:29,467
Did he give that to her?

184
00:08:29,550 --> 00:08:31,969
Yeah, but what are you doing here?

185
00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:34,096
I'm rescuing my love
from sexual slavery.

186
00:08:34,180 --> 00:08:36,682
It looks like you're just reading
an Indian hair magazine.

187
00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:38,559
Shouldn't you like storm down
and get her?

188
00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:41,938
I was going to, but I didn't know
how big Prashant was,

189
00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:43,981
and also, I'm scared of your mom.

190
00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:47,902
Okay. It doesn't seem like
you'll be storming anywhere.

191
00:08:47,985 --> 00:08:50,238
You just stay here, and I'll get Kamala.

192
00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:56,369
I thought I came to America
for the great education,

193
00:08:56,452 --> 00:08:59,038
but I think my favorite part
might be the ice cream.

194
00:08:59,121 --> 00:09:00,957
There are so many flavors here.

195
00:09:01,415 --> 00:09:02,875
Way more than just pistachio.

196
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:06,379
My favorite part is that traffic
is separated into two directions.

197
00:09:06,462 --> 00:09:07,505
It's adorable.

198
00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:09,298
That took long enough.

199
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:12,051
Sorry. I was busy trying
to find the perfect spot

200
00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:13,928
for the crystal beaver in Kamala's room.

201
00:09:14,011 --> 00:09:17,098
In fact, I think she should check out
where I put it.

202
00:09:17,181 --> 00:09:19,308
- No, that's okay. I trust you.
- You shouldn't.

203
00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,769
You should really see the beaver
for yourself.

204
00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:24,021
You're never gonna believe
where it ended up.

205
00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:25,898
A shelf? A table?

206
00:09:26,315 --> 00:09:28,192
- Now I'm curious. Can I go see?
- No!

207
00:09:29,944 --> 00:09:32,196
Kamala should be alone
with the crystal beaver

208
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,532
and figure out what the future holds
for the two of them.

209
00:09:34,991 --> 00:09:38,286
Okay. I guess I'll go look.

210
00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:39,704
<b>[EXHALES]</b>

211
00:09:40,204 --> 00:09:42,915
<b>PRASHANT:</b> So, Uncle,
you're a security system...

212
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,333
What are you up to?

213
00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:47,003
I thought we said no Devi nonsense.

214
00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:49,088
<b>ARAVIND:</b> ...in the south San Jose area.

215
00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:50,881
Nalini, please calm down.

216
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:54,719
I will not calm down when this child
insists on being such a headache to me!

217
00:09:54,802 --> 00:09:55,886
Oh, my God. Dad!

218
00:09:55,970 --> 00:09:57,555
Devi is not a headache.

219
00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,016
The concert starts in 30 minutes.

220
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:03,853
So let's stop yelling at each other
and look for the sheet music together,

221
00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:07,106
and when we come home later,
I will fix this.

222
00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:10,151
Kanna, please go upstairs and check again.

223
00:10:10,234 --> 00:10:11,444
Upstairs!

224
00:10:12,903 --> 00:10:14,905
Yeah, yeah.
Take your time going up!

225
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,575
<b>McENROE:</b> Okay, keep it together, Devi.

226
00:10:17,658 --> 00:10:19,994
You don't need to go back there.
Stay in the present.

227
00:10:20,077 --> 00:10:23,456
I'm sure whatever your Uncle Aravind
is saying is really interesting.

228
00:10:23,539 --> 00:10:24,373
Focus.

229
00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:25,857
<b>ARAVIND:</b> What people don't realize

230
00:10:25,875 --> 00:10:28,669
is that most home burglaries
happen during the daytime.

231
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:33,341
That's why I recommend clients live
as far north on their blocks as possible

232
00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:34,800
where days are shorter.

233
00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:40,473
- Hello, Kamala.
- Oh, my God. Steve?

234
00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:43,934
Why are you here?

235
00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:46,978
Because you shouldn't be bought and sold
by your family like a prized calf.

236
00:10:47,188 --> 00:10:50,733
That's not what's happening here,
and that also feels a little racial.

237
00:10:50,816 --> 00:10:52,693
I want a chance to make my offer.

238
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:54,695
Let me start by saying
I don't have a ring.

239
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:56,280
No, no, no. Get up.

240
00:10:56,906 --> 00:10:58,658
I don't want to marry you.

241
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:00,618
But you want to marry
that stranger downstairs?

242
00:11:00,701 --> 00:11:02,119
No, I don't want to marry anyone!

243
00:11:04,205 --> 00:11:05,205
<b>[SIGHS]</b>

244
00:11:05,581 --> 00:11:08,501
Oh, Steve, you're so sweet,

245
00:11:08,584 --> 00:11:11,379
and handsome,
and surprisingly good at mini golf,

246
00:11:12,004 --> 00:11:14,048
and I appreciate you being
my first boyfriend, but--

247
00:11:14,131 --> 00:11:15,131
Oh, no.

248
00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:18,469
Did I just talk you into
breaking up with me?

249
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:21,555
Sorry, but I think you did.

250
00:11:22,598 --> 00:11:24,850
So, Uncle tells me
you're a dermatologist, Auntie.

251
00:11:24,934 --> 00:11:28,062
She is.
We have a lot of doctors in the family.

252
00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:32,066
Cousin Manju started
her cardiology residency at 18.

253
00:11:32,149 --> 00:11:34,402
Devi, you have some catching up to do.

254
00:11:34,485 --> 00:11:37,530
Well, Cousin Manju is also
a 28-year-old virgin.

255
00:11:37,613 --> 00:11:38,614
So, I'm good.

256
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,282
<b>[LAUGHS]</b>

257
00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:41,826
<b>[LAUGHS]</b>

258
00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:45,496
<b>McENROE:</b> The day was turning around.
Forget those pesky flashbacks.

259
00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:48,582
Devi had reined in her brain
and was being charming as hell.

260
00:11:48,666 --> 00:11:51,252
So, Devi, what are you into?

261
00:11:51,335 --> 00:11:54,296
Oh, this young lady
is a very talented musician.

262
00:11:54,755 --> 00:11:56,924
Devi, why don't you play something
on your harp?

263
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,970
<b>[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

264
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,516
<b>ARAVIND:</b> Devi. Hello?

265
00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:08,394
Don't leave us music lovers waiting.

266
00:12:08,477 --> 00:12:12,106
Devi is, uh, actually taking
a little break from the harp right now.

267
00:12:12,189 --> 00:12:14,650
Kanna, why don't you
just help me clear the table?

268
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:15,776
I don't know about you,

269
00:12:15,860 --> 00:12:18,362
but now all I can think about
is hearing some harp.

270
00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,821
<b>[WHISPERING]</b> What's wrong with you?
You're acting so strange.

271
00:12:24,827 --> 00:12:27,121
I'm fine.
I think I'm having low blood sugar.

272
00:12:27,204 --> 00:12:28,873
I don't see how.
You ate five samosas.

273
00:12:28,956 --> 00:12:31,625
I'm sorry.
I'm just under a lot of stress right now.

274
00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:34,086
How are your legs?
Can you feel this?

275
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:36,922
- Yes, and it hurts! Stop pinching me.
- Okay.

276
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:38,883
My legs are fine.
Everything's fine.

277
00:12:38,966 --> 00:12:40,217
Okay. Good, good.

278
00:12:40,301 --> 00:12:42,781
I just don't want Prashant
to tell his family that we're weird.

279
00:12:42,803 --> 00:12:45,848
Okay, look. You go back in there.
You talk to him.

280
00:12:45,931 --> 00:12:47,850
I'm gonna go see
what's taking Kamala so long.

281
00:12:49,351 --> 00:12:50,436
No, Mom, wait!

282
00:12:51,020 --> 00:12:53,189
No, it's not because you're bad at sex.

283
00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:55,858
- Oh, God.
- <b>[DOOR CLOSES]</b>

284
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:59,653
Kamala, what is your boyfriend doing here
when your future husband is here?

285
00:12:59,737 --> 00:13:02,233
- How did you know that I had a boyfriend?
- It's pretty obvious.

286
00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:04,950
All the sneaking around,
all the whispered phone calls.

287
00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:07,369
I also saw him fall off the roof
a couple of mornings ago.

288
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:09,580
I'm so sorry, Kamala.
I tried to stop her,

289
00:13:09,663 --> 00:13:11,665
but she shot up here
like a frigging panther.

290
00:13:11,749 --> 00:13:12,875
I have let you down, Auntie.

291
00:13:12,958 --> 00:13:15,795
You welcomed me into your home,
and I've been lying to you.

292
00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:17,546
<b>McENROE:</b> Devi felt bad for her cousin.

293
00:13:17,630 --> 00:13:20,800
She knew the storm that was
about to be unleashed on her.

294
00:13:20,883 --> 00:13:22,968
This was gonna be a bloodbath.

295
00:13:23,052 --> 00:13:24,970
It's okay. I understand.

296
00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:28,307
Huh? You understand?

297
00:13:28,390 --> 00:13:30,518
You have literally never said that
to me before.

298
00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:31,727
Devi, please.

299
00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:34,605
<b>NALINI:</b> All I'm saying is

300
00:13:34,688 --> 00:13:37,525
I know there are some real hunks
on the Caltech campus.

301
00:13:38,025 --> 00:13:39,485
I've watched Big Bang Theory.

302
00:13:39,568 --> 00:13:40,736
So you're not mad?

303
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:41,862
Of course not.

304
00:13:41,946 --> 00:13:43,280
What the hell is going on here?

305
00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:45,699
Look, no one is forcing you
to do anything.

306
00:13:45,783 --> 00:13:48,828
All a family can do is just point you
in the right direction.

307
00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,247
- What if I'm the right direction?
- You're not.

308
00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:54,416
Okay, we need to get him out of here
before Prashant or Aravind see him.

309
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,085
Uh, he can go back out the window.

310
00:13:56,168 --> 00:13:58,420
No, no, he can't.
It's too risky.

311
00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:00,923
Aravind might just hear him
clomping around on the roof.

312
00:14:01,006 --> 00:14:03,217
Then he'll have to go out the front door,

313
00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:04,885
but we'll need a distraction.

314
00:14:05,469 --> 00:14:06,469
Devi?

315
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:12,017
Yeah, I can do that.

316
00:14:13,143 --> 00:14:14,143
Get up.

317
00:14:15,187 --> 00:14:18,774
Prashant, I noticed that you carry
your cell phone in your front pocket.

318
00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,985
Is that because you do not wish
to have any children?

319
00:14:21,068 --> 00:14:24,822
Hi. Would either of you care
to have your chai in the living room?

320
00:14:24,905 --> 00:14:26,073
Oh, God, yes.

321
00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:29,410
Uh, no, thank you. I prefer to lift
my tea from dining table level.

322
00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:31,704
But wouldn't rather sit
in a more comfortable seat?

323
00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:33,204
No.

324
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:34,874
Okay.

325
00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:36,125
Um...

326
00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,508
What if I played my harp for you?

327
00:14:46,051 --> 00:14:48,470
Really? How wonderful!

328
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,767
<b>[TUNING HARP]</b>

329
00:14:53,851 --> 00:14:55,561
Sorry. It's been a minute.

330
00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,313
I just need to tune this thing.

331
00:14:57,396 --> 00:14:59,231
It's fine. Take your time.

332
00:15:00,024 --> 00:15:02,026
<b>[TUNING HARP]</b>

333
00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:05,779
<b>PRASHANT:</b> Are you okay, Devi?

334
00:15:05,863 --> 00:15:07,615
You don't have to play
if you don't want to.

335
00:15:07,698 --> 00:15:10,451
Maybe we should wait
until Kamala and Nalini come back.

336
00:15:10,534 --> 00:15:12,161
What's taking them so long?

337
00:15:12,661 --> 00:15:15,497
No, it's fine. I'm ready.

338
00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:25,424
<b><font color=

339
00:15:30,721 --> 00:15:33,807
Kanna, look what I got you.
It's a harp.

340
00:15:33,891 --> 00:15:36,226
Harp? I wanted a guitar.

341
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,437
<b>MOHAN:</b> No, you don't. Come here.

342
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,941
Any idiot can play the guitar.
It only has six strings.

343
00:15:42,024 --> 00:15:43,692
How many strings do you see here?

344
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:45,903
- A million.
- Exactly.

345
00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:49,448
<b>MOHAN:</b> See, this is an instrument
for a real musician.

346
00:15:49,531 --> 00:15:51,909
You're far too special
for a stupid guitar.

347
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:53,785
Prodigy.

348
00:15:55,204 --> 00:15:57,081
<b><font color=
a breakthrough.

349
00:15:57,998 --> 00:15:59,708
Devi is playing the harp again?

350
00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:01,585
Maybe she's all better now.

351
00:16:03,754 --> 00:16:04,922
Shall we go?

352
00:16:15,057 --> 00:16:16,058
<b>[DOOR CLOSES]</b>

353
00:16:16,141 --> 00:16:17,184
Goodbye, Steve.

354
00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:19,144
I'm sorry if I've hurt you.

355
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,312
You did.

356
00:16:26,527 --> 00:16:27,653
Is Devi home?

357
00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:39,915
<b>[SONG ENDS]</b>

358
00:16:40,541 --> 00:16:42,167
<b>[ARARVIND AND PRASHANT CLAPPING]</b>

359
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:44,962
How wonderful!
You're very talented, Devi.

360
00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:47,798
Prashant, we should set her up
with your little brother.

361
00:16:47,881 --> 00:16:50,759
Your brother Arun, not the one
who works at Massage Envy.

362
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:52,302
<b>NALINI:</b> Hello, everyone.

363
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:54,888
<b>[LAUGHS]</b>
Here is Kamala.

364
00:16:55,514 --> 00:16:57,474
I'm just gonna steal Devi for a second.

365
00:16:58,934 --> 00:17:01,395
Did you get rid of Steve?
How hard did he cry?

366
00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:05,649
Paxton?

367
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,776
There are more boys
coming and going in this house

368
00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:09,236
than the GameStop at the mall.

369
00:17:09,319 --> 00:17:11,613
Look, I can go.
It seems like a bad time.

370
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:14,992
- You just weren't responding to texts.
- Don't go, Paxton.

371
00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:18,579
You haven't returned Devi back her dress
that she took off in your car.

372
00:17:19,621 --> 00:17:22,583
Okay, I did take off my dress
and leave it in his car,

373
00:17:22,666 --> 00:17:25,544
- but not in the way you think I did.
- Don't even try.

374
00:17:25,627 --> 00:17:28,505
I cannot believe you
because you keep lying to me.

375
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:31,589
She's telling the truth, Dr. Vishwakumar.
She fell in the pool at the party,

376
00:17:31,633 --> 00:17:32,993
so I gave her a change of clothes.

377
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,720
- <b>NALINI:</b> A party?
- Oh, shit.

378
00:17:34,803 --> 00:17:37,431
<b><font color=
for clearing that up.

379
00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:43,062
So, not only did you disobey me
by going to this party last night,

380
00:17:43,145 --> 00:17:45,647
you were so sober, you fell into the pool,

381
00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,858
and then did God knows what
with this boy in his car.

382
00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:49,568
All we did was kiss.

383
00:17:49,651 --> 00:17:50,861
You what?

384
00:17:50,944 --> 00:17:53,947
<b>McENROE:</b> Paxton,
these are very unforced errors.

385
00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:56,742
Oh, Devi, this is just terrific.

386
00:17:56,825 --> 00:17:58,410
Great decision making.

387
00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,412
Why don't you just
let this idiot knock you up?

388
00:18:00,871 --> 00:18:04,500
Maybe Princeton will allow you
to raise a little baby in your dorm room.

389
00:18:04,583 --> 00:18:05,793
He's not an idiot.

390
00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:09,546
Oh, I'm sorry. Is he an honors student?
I had no idea. My apologies, Paxton.

391
00:18:09,630 --> 00:18:12,049
<b>McENROE:</b> Even though Nalini
was talking out of frustration

392
00:18:12,132 --> 00:18:13,258
more than anything else,

393
00:18:13,342 --> 00:18:16,053
Paxton was stung by these little digs
at his intelligence.

394
00:18:16,136 --> 00:18:17,513
- I'm gonna go.
- Mmm.

395
00:18:17,596 --> 00:18:20,974
You must have a very busy day
returning dresses to other smart girls

396
00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:22,893
whose futures you're trying to ruin.

397
00:18:22,976 --> 00:18:23,894
Mom, stop.

398
00:18:23,977 --> 00:18:25,437
What was that?

399
00:18:25,521 --> 00:18:27,106
I barely did anything.

400
00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:29,316
I kissed one boy one time.

401
00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:31,777
Meanwhile, the guy
Kamala's having sex with

402
00:18:31,860 --> 00:18:33,862
just broke into our house,
and you don't even care.

403
00:18:34,279 --> 00:18:38,158
Well, I'll say it again. I'm not surprised
someone has broken into this house.

404
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:40,869
This seems like
a very private conversation.

405
00:18:43,038 --> 00:18:44,038
<b>KAMALA:</b> Prashant...

406
00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:48,752
I am so sorry.

407
00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:53,882
I was seeing someone,

408
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,968
and he did kind of
just break into the house.

409
00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:59,346
Was it the guys who was climbing
the tree outside when I arrived?

410
00:18:59,429 --> 00:19:00,722
I thought he was the landscaper.

411
00:19:00,806 --> 00:19:02,349
Yes, that was Steve.

412
00:19:02,432 --> 00:19:04,184
So this was all a waste of time?

413
00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:06,436
Wow. I feel like I'm being pranked.

414
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,064
No. No, I would never prank you.

415
00:19:09,148 --> 00:19:10,190
I hate pranks.

416
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:13,485
I don't understand why America has
a national holiday to celebrate them.

417
00:19:13,569 --> 00:19:16,822
I agree. April Fools' is way scarier
than Halloween.

418
00:19:16,905 --> 00:19:17,905
<b>[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]</b>

419
00:19:18,365 --> 00:19:22,244
Look, Prashant,
I am so sorry this happened,

420
00:19:23,287 --> 00:19:25,789
but I promise you
I'm not with Steve anymore.

421
00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:30,961
But also... I don't think I'm ready
to get engaged today.

422
00:19:31,044 --> 00:19:33,172
<b>[LAUGHS]</b>
Well, that is very clear.

423
00:19:34,006 --> 00:19:35,757
That doesn't mean I won't ever be.

424
00:19:36,383 --> 00:19:39,094
This all just feels so strange
at the moment.

425
00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,013
I know. It's weird for me too.

426
00:19:41,638 --> 00:19:43,724
To be honest, I'm actually relieved

427
00:19:43,807 --> 00:19:46,327
you aren't some Goody Two-shoes
who does everything you're told.

428
00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:48,437
It makes you more interesting.

429
00:19:49,479 --> 00:19:51,481
- You think so?
- Definitely.

430
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:53,325
Every other Indian girl
I've been set up with

431
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:54,902
has tried to act like my mother.

432
00:19:54,985 --> 00:19:56,862
<b><font color=
Yes. What is that about?

433
00:19:56,945 --> 00:20:00,365
I don't know, but I'm certainly not trying
to go to bed with my mother every night.

434
00:20:00,449 --> 00:20:02,034
<b>[BOTH LAUGH]</b>

435
00:20:03,118 --> 00:20:06,079
I know you just had another man
climbing on you roof,

436
00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:09,499
so maybe I'm an idiot for saying this,
but I can't help it.

437
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,002
I kinda like you.

438
00:20:12,628 --> 00:20:14,129
I kinda like you too.

439
00:20:14,213 --> 00:20:16,215
And your family is very...

440
00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:18,216
entertaining.

441
00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:21,136
What if we just kept this between us?

442
00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,722
Took things slow.
Just got to know each other.

443
00:20:24,973 --> 00:20:28,185
Are you saying you don't want
my uncle around every time we talk?

444
00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:29,853
I'd prefer if he were not.

445
00:20:29,937 --> 00:20:31,188
I would too.

446
00:20:31,271 --> 00:20:32,648
- <b>[BOTH LAUGH]</b>
- <b>[DOOR OPENS]</b>

447
00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,775
Two secret boyfriends
have entered this house

448
00:20:34,858 --> 00:20:37,945
during a lunch
to decide this family's future.

449
00:20:38,028 --> 00:20:40,447
What is it when I'm not here?
Three secret boyfriends?

450
00:20:40,530 --> 00:20:42,574
This household is out of control!

451
00:20:42,658 --> 00:20:43,659
It's not out of control.

452
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:46,495
I'd argue it's too under control.

453
00:20:46,578 --> 00:20:48,455
Devi, do not talk back to your uncle.

454
00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:52,209
The lack of discipline and respect here
is astounding to me.

455
00:20:52,751 --> 00:20:55,671
When you return to India,
this behavior will be put to bed!

456
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,214
We're going to India?

457
00:20:57,297 --> 00:20:59,716
Can't we vacation in Aspen
like Ben's family?

458
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,420
It's the playground
of the rich and famous.

459
00:21:01,426 --> 00:21:04,805
<b>[LAUGHS]</b> You're not just going on
vacation to India, young lady.

460
00:21:05,430 --> 00:21:07,891
Mom, what is he talking about?

461
00:21:08,809 --> 00:21:12,396
Sweetheart, your uncle and I have been
talking for the past month or so

462
00:21:12,479 --> 00:21:15,983
about how hard it's been for us here,
especially with family being so far away--

463
00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:18,777
Oh, my God.
You want us to move to India?

464
00:21:19,236 --> 00:21:20,236
I...

465
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,326
I think it would be better for us.

466
00:21:28,328 --> 00:21:30,414
- I need to go to my room.
- <b>NALINI:</b> Devi...

467
00:21:31,581 --> 00:21:32,581
Aravind.

468
00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:36,336
- Devi, listen to me.
- No, I don't want to.

469
00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:39,131
Look, I'll know it'll be a big change,
but I think we need it.

470
00:21:39,214 --> 00:21:41,934
Look, I feel like a stranger here,
and I don't have a support system,

471
00:21:42,009 --> 00:21:44,469
and frankly, without your father around,
I just...

472
00:21:45,053 --> 00:21:47,347
I just feel like I'm really struggling
to raise you.

473
00:21:47,431 --> 00:21:49,433
<b>[SENTIMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

474
00:21:58,066 --> 00:21:59,109
<b>[SIGHS]</b>

475
00:21:59,818 --> 00:22:01,361
<b>NALINI:</b> You are too easy on her.

476
00:22:01,445 --> 00:22:03,045
No, I'm not.
I have a different approach.

477
00:22:03,071 --> 00:22:05,198
Okay, great.
Then why don't you raise her?

478
00:22:05,282 --> 00:22:08,327
Because I give up. I am done.
She's too headstrong and doesn't listen.

479
00:22:08,410 --> 00:22:10,370
Whoever this child is,
I am through with her!

480
00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:12,664
- <b>MOHAN:</b> Nalini--
- <b><font color=

481
00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:14,750
She's no daughter of mine.

482
00:22:19,838 --> 00:22:22,007
I understand you're struggling
to raise me.

483
00:22:22,090 --> 00:22:24,426
You're struggling to raise me
'cause you don't like me.

484
00:22:25,385 --> 00:22:28,221
What? Don't like you?
That's not true.

485
00:22:28,930 --> 00:22:31,058
I heard what you said the night Dad died.

486
00:22:31,475 --> 00:22:33,143
You said I wasn't your daughter.

487
00:22:35,604 --> 00:22:37,481
I know I'm just a burden to you.

488
00:22:37,564 --> 00:22:39,149
So you can go to India alone.

489
00:22:39,232 --> 00:22:41,318
Or maybe take Kamala with you.

490
00:22:41,943 --> 00:22:43,503
She's the daughter you actually wanted.

491
00:22:43,987 --> 00:22:46,323
Devi, that's not fair.

492
00:22:46,406 --> 00:22:47,949
<b><font color=
What's not fair

493
00:22:48,033 --> 00:22:50,994
is that I lost the only parent
that actually cared about me.

494
00:22:54,664 --> 00:22:56,875
I wish you were the one
that died that night.

495
00:22:57,876 --> 00:22:58,876
<b>[DOOR SLAMS]</b>

496
00:23:02,547 --> 00:23:04,508
<b>[HARP MUSIC PLAYING]</b>

